I have always had a belief that there IS a God – but I have not been able to subscribe to any particular “Christian” doctrine. I cannot believe that a God of Love would purposely predetermine anyone (Jesus) should be tortured to death, nor do I believe in “original sin”.
As a child I was exposed to Sunday school and Vacation Bible School. My stepdad loudly proclaimed the curious phenomenon in the Bible “nonsense”, and my mother was non-verbal on the subject. In my youth, I determined that I did not need any man – Jesus, the preacher, or anyone else – to be a translator between me and God. I promptly pushed all thought of God and religion into the background, and began drinking my way through life. Twenty five years later, in a 12 step program, I re-opened the question of “God”. I began attending church again.
After about 5 years, I found I could not resolve the questions in my mind with the statements I heard in church. I resigned myself to not understanding or believing that which was taught as “Christianity.”
At some point I became acquainted with the writings of Emmet Fox. I collected and read as many of Fox’s books and pamphlets as I could find. About 3 years ago, I began attending a Unity church regularly, and taking classes, learned about metaphysics. I began to piece together a concept that worked for me.
Through this process, I arrived at and settled on the following concepts:
- There are spiritual forces at work in the universe that are God-related. If I cooperate with those forces, my life goes a lot more smoothly.
- I understand “God” today as a set of immutable spiritual laws that are at work whether or not I recognize them.
- Prayer and meditation are spiritual practices I use to connect with the essence of God that lives within me, any time I desire.
- I try to live by specific spiritual/moral principles: Honesty, hope, faith, courage, integrity, willingness, humility, brotherly love, justice, perseverance, conscious contact with God, and service.
- Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and thoughts about how God works in their life. There are as many paths to God as there are people.
- Jesus’s teachings are worth studying and trying to live by. I believe that Jesus is one of the most spiritually evolved humans ever to walk the planet.
- Sin is that which separates me from my connection with God and other people.
- At the current time and at my current level of understanding, I do not subscribe to “conventional” Christianity.
- There is so much I do not know!
Today my understanding of God is framed in the reference of the metaphysics classes I’ve taken. I explore and re-examine each thought and statement in light of what I have learned in recent classes. Some thoughts require further dissection, and analysis; others ring with truth and still others are discarded because they don’t hold up to what I believe at this point.
Just a quick comment--very nice looking blog. I'll write more later.
ReplyDeleteHi Lonnie,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your snapshot. I don't know if you experienced the feeling of vulnerability I did when Dr.Tom ("DT?") indicated we had to post these things online. I heard some immediate talk of revisions that would be needed and contemplated doing that myself but opted against it as the vulnerability allows for greater learning. Reminded me of the time in fourth grade when for the class play we were all dressed as teeth with paper costumes and I was a molar. When I stood up to give my line the kid behind me had his foot on my costume so it ripped off as I stood. I bravely just gave my one line and sat back down. Vulnerability can be a great teaching moment. Let's be ripped molars! :)
I kind of reacted when you said you were "exposed" to Sunday school- makes it sound like some deadly corrupting virus. Using Dr. Tom's paradigm, does that make you a refugee? I'm still somewhat confused as to the utility of the three classifications except as barometers of woundedness.
I giggled when you wrote about how life goes more smoothly when you cooperate with spiritual forces. I know I am perverse as that made me think of the poto mitan in the Vodou tradition, the "axis mundi" down which the gods (loas) come to enter their objects of possession who willingly cooperate and court them. Are we possessed by our New Thought panentheistic ideology? Do you mind if I ask rhetorical question to myself? :)
I enjoy how the notion of "sin" persists in our theology. I guess I am a sinner in that I willingly separate myself from my connection with many people who I believe to be poor influences on me or who I believe are crazy or whose only contribution is to remind me of who I once was and may yet be again if not sometimes for some kind of dogged determination or inertia and sometimes joyful bounding into ever evolving levels of bliss. As a minister of course my perspective changes to doing what I can to facilitate the recognition and expansion of the nature within that individual- to the extent they so desire such ministrations. Sometimes (and it is difficult for me to be so honest with myself sometimes so note I'm trying hard here) in my most cynical mode I think the minimal love I need offer is to recognize the divinity within, to wish them all the best and steer a wide berth indeed- does that make me sinful? (another rhetorical question).
I liked how you foregrounded that your current understanding of God is based on the metaphysics classes you've taken. I'm in the same boat. I have of late, however, begun to question the philosophical underpinnings of those ontological structures- which can be a lonely place to be. I can see how the art and practice of theology can at times be a most difficult one as we are always probing the outer limits of who and what this God Idea/idea/Law is.
I'm glad to have fellow adventurers like you with me as we forge into this jungle- perhaps there is safety in numbers eh? :) Thank you for helping me re-frame, live and move forward and have a sense of beingness and camaraderie- a precious gift.
Cheers,
Anthony
Hi Anthony;
DeleteAbsolutely yes, on the vulnerability. I enjoyed your share - and rhetorical questions!
I am a refugee...from some parts of my life; and then an immigrant into other parts.
The oppression I experienced as a child and young adult was indirect... rather than overt. As I mentioned, I had limited experience ("exposed" ) to religion - I would call myself "unchurched". The discrimination and bigotry I experienced as a lesbian was influenced to some degree by religious ideas, but moreso from the nature of the rural community in which I lived. I only had to be told once that I was going to hell, after which I went "underground" and lived in fear of discovery. I am a refugee from that experience.
However, I did not flee to "religion" for relief. I wandered for years in the desert, so to speak. When my interest in things spiritual was finally re-ignited, I began looking for a spiritual community of "my people". After much trial and error, I found the Unity message (and community) and knew I was "home".
re: cooperation with spiritual forces - if I think of them in the same manner as I think of the force of gravity (a physical force) - my life is more successful when I cooperate with gravity, too! Kind of ties into our discussion about pacifism on some level, perhaps? I'm thinking of what happens to me when I am in a resistant posture around some situation...
One more comment, re my definition of "sin". When I use the definition of "separation of self from God and others" - I use it to describe the results of attitudes / thoughts / behaviors that "shatter" the conceptual "Oneness" that we talk about. I too, use discernment when determining how to respond in any given moment. I have plenty of experience with people who are dysfunctional, whom I choose not to connect with. I can, however, hold them in love and light in my mind, and envision their Christ nature.
Well, more blogs to read and think about. Thank you for your thoughtful and thought provoking comments!
Blessings,
Lonnie
Lonnie,
ReplyDeleteEmmet Fox is an important teacher of Rev. Michael Moran, my minister in Sacramento. In fact he quotes him regulary - most often he uses the quote “Do it trembling if you must, but do it!” Needless to say I've needed to go to him more than once about this journey I am on and Emmet is a frequent participant in our conversations! Thanks for sharing!
Hi Lonnie,
ReplyDeleteI wanted to respond to your Snapshot, because I found it to be so clear and concise. I can also relate to the family journey with religion and spirituality. My father has wrestled with his distrust of the Catholic church his entire life. Because of that, religion was almost taboe in my home as a child. And, I do believe I am grateful he didn't teach me that! Today, I am sometimes perplexed as to why I have this third chakra pull to continue this journey with Spirit. It certainly didn't come from my parents! I am so thankful a friend brought me to a Unity church in my mid-20's. I remember how joyous I felt to experience such am emotional and spiritual awakening at that time. Thank God, I walked in those church doors. I just don't even know who I would be without Unity today. Thanks for the reminder of what a gift Unity has been in my life!!!!
Shawn